If you’re lucky enough to survive a nuclear apocalypse, you will inevitably start looking for things to do.
You can forget about Facebook and TikTok because the Internet will most likely be down unless Elon Musk decides to go to Mars without Starlink but he most likely will take his Internet with him.
So what are you supposed to do other than play with rocks and meditate all day long?
What if I told you that life during post apocalypose doesn’t have to be boring? What if I told you that you can survive without Internet? What if I told you… ok, let me just tell you.
Before taking shelter in the nearby bunker, you need to bring some sort of computer with you. Preferably, a laptop because desktops would require a whole desk setup to be usable.
Laptops without an OS are useless. If you have Windows or Linux installed on it, you’re pretty much done for because these OSes are unusable without the Internet. Can you even login to Windows without the Internet?
You need an OS that remains useful with or without Internet.
That’s where OpenBSD comes in.
As soon as you hear the sirens urging the populace to enter bunkers, you need to quickly go on the OpenBSD download site and download the latest installXX.iso for your laptop.
Also bring a USB stick with you.
Once you’re inside the bunker, copy the install iso to your USB stick:
dd if=install71.iso of=/dev/sdb bs=64K
If you’re on Windows you’re screwed because you need to download a program called Rufus from the Internet to copy the image. If you have Internet in the bunker then it’s your lucky day, otherwise, serves you right for being a heretic. Always use free software!
Once you prepare the USB stick, hang out with people at the bunker. Stop being antisocial.
Once the nuclear apocalypse has happened and you’ve ran out of things to talk about with other bunker denizens, it’s time to install OpenBSD on your laptop because whatever it was running before is now useless.
Once you install OpenBSD and login, you will have an email from Theo de Raadt himself. It’s like an email from the past.
You know those movies where the main character discovers a relic from the past that contains an hologram that projects a person’s image and wisdom? In OpenBSD, you get an email instead.
Open the mail program, no wait! Actually, type
man mail. You now have everything you need to
know about the mail command right in the terminal.
No need for DuckDuckGo or StackOverflow.
Type more 1 inside the mail app to read the message.
In this email, he will tell you everything you need to
know to use this OS, such as how to use man and where
to go next — man afterboot.
In the afterboot man page, you will receive all the
information you need to setup the OS.
You can setup a graphical environment with cwm.
Checkout man xenodm for instructions on how to
setup graphical login. Or just use xinit if you want.
Don’t know what xinit is? Type man xinit.
Man pages in OpenBSD aren’t like those tiny manuals you receive when you buy a cheap iPhone knockoff from Aliexpress. They’re more like the Library of Alexandria .
There’s even games for you to play. Go to /usr/games
and you’ll find an assortment of games that should keep
you busy for the rest of your life. With these games,
you can remain a Baggins for the rest of your days instead
of having to seek fun by adventuring far way like a Took.
I recommend the quiz game. It tests your general knowledge,
which is perfect to prepare you for the rebuilding
of society.
Notice how you never need Internet when you install OpenBSD, except for things like synchronizing with time servers or for installing extra packages. But who cares about time when there’s no work or responsibilities? And who cares about extra software? For example, there’s no need for Libreoffice because you’re no longer a slave having to type stuff in Writer documents from 9AM to 6PM.
OpenBSD was create for free men like you, enjoy it.
Edit 23/04/2022: A reader claimed that Linux is also usable without Internet.
It depends on what is meant by usable. As far as I know, Linux man pages are like napkin notes when compared to OpenBSD ones. To learn how to use a Linux system, you need to visit the Arch Linux wiki on the Internet. Not ideal post apocalypse.
Also, Linux distros don’t come with games by default.
© Michael Karamuth 2022